It turns out that this year, my Birthday falls on that other special day of the year, 'Fathers Day.'

Maddy, as thoughtful as ever, has created two cards for us.

All fair and equal there, you think. Until that is you read the messages:

Mummy's card:

'The lovely message written on the front of this card roughly translates to: To the bestest Mummy in the world, I hope you have a wonderful Birthday! Love you lots! Mads. XXX (sloppy kisses)."

Daddy's card:

"Happy Father's Day. Lots of love, Maddy."

I think we FINALLY have proof who Maddy loves best...

A speaking part

Much of the past few months has been spent enunciating VERY SIMPLE words but inches from Maddy's face, hoping in vain that she's going to experience a lightbulb moment, and sentences are going to pour forth from her mouth.

Alas, our hothousing has failed to pay off. Until that is today when Charlene, our nanny, left for the evening and said Bye to Maddy. After waiting for a suitably dramatic moment (Charlene had actually gone) she waved her hands and said 'bye' in reply.

Yes, we agree, we think she's a genius too.

Not. Going. Anywhere.

Not until that wet stuff goes away, that is.

Grubby oik

This year, we are holidaying in Italy.

But from Maddy's general appearance this weekend, you'd be forgiven for thinking we were off to Magaluf for a week of boozy, sweaty, oikery.

Brings a new meaning to the phrase 'the lady is a tramp'.